whats the name of the jew you used to have sex with that lives on evergreen?
be more specific...?
If it wasnt for my iphone and loopt, I would still be wandering the streets in a drunken stooper. Thanks Steve Jobs.
which bright sisters idea was it to put semi-formal in the middle of no-shave november?
i'm starting to get really nervous about the relationship i have with my cat
no today was horrible, i woke up and somebody slit my car tire and left an apology letter in my wiper that said "sorry wrong house"
Forgot to mention...Pamela Anderson has HPV, so i feel like im in good company
Just remembered getting lost in a "shortcut" through yards and GPSing my way home last night
I just saw that cheerleader from u of arkansas that I hooked up with over spring break on espn. My parents would be so proud.
you might as well be a hobo. you were covered in pee last night hanging out on the stairs drunk.
right. well we all have our lows.
I think I just got propositioned for sex by the lady behind the counter at dunkin donuts
The sad part is that if I don't get a random pic of your balls or ass or both every month, I start to worry that we're not friends anymore
He doesn't have an existential crisis after we have really violent sex now which is nice
Does sweetest day count when you're spending it with your fuck buddy, high and eating Pizza Hut?
I just put my eye make up on in the bathroom of the bar.... I may be too comfortable here....
It's totally a relationship. we have sex in other people's beds, watch mad men while high and get drunk on his teammates' beer. don't you dare stomp on my dreams with your societal judgments
Randomize
