Stage 55 clinger. not a typo. I cannot even believe this shit.
I'm not being over dramatic, but I think my heart is going to stop beating.
you said you wanted to feel how much my penis weighed for educational purposes
Friend date it is then. Question: Can friends engage in sexual activities after dates?
I WILL BE THE BEST FICTITIONAL HISTORICAL FIGURE FOR THE FEMENIST MOVEMENT THE WORLD HAS EVER SEEN
Was the first guy that bit your neck last night wearing a trenchcoat...I have a vague memory.
I wonder if you're allowed to smoke pot at Denver bronco games now...
You could totally spank that new found Catholicism out of him.
I wasn't even hungover I was just mourning my dignity
I just my had my first cup of coffee in a week. I think I might orgasm.
Yo whoever left a thong on the dining room table, first of all get help second of all please remove it now
you walked into the party, and all you had on was your left sock... literally.
And, by “make you dinner” I mean “have lots of sex and multiple orgasms.” So you should probably eat something and before you come over
And hydrate too
no no no no you can't just say your dirtiest secret is "i sat on goldfish by accident once" and just leave i have QUESTIONS
AT LEAST TELL ME IF THE GOLDFISH WAS STILL IN A BOWL??????????????
The last time I was on vacation the pandemic blew up. Can't wait to see how my vacation fucks up the world this time.
Randomize
