D3 body, D1 cock
I had a dream last night where you were a transsexual in a low cut blue dress with lovely long brown hair. You were very pretty. I hope you are well.
we saw a llama on the side of the road. That's when we knew everything was going to be alright.
Oh my god it just tripped me out that I used to be a baby, I had to tell you.
I've also hijacked your can opener. Sadly not for the same sexual reason as the muddler.
Do you know anything about the Easter basket sitting on my doorstep filled with porn and peeps?
I have 20 seconds to get my life together and look presentable.
I just set a bowl of cap n crunch on fire. That high.
Thats like me asking what you think of antisocial polish guys with mysterious rashes
I'm two shots in and wandering around Barnes and Noble with $58 in singles.
Seriously? People are paying $45 for Surge?!? I've seen better one night stand decisions being made then the choices being made on amazon orders of Surge
And for some reason every time I get drunk I just want to tell you that I have a mini secret personal fan club of your dick
Drinking and decided to streak in the apartment fountain. Canadian goose shit and sharp rocks on the bottom. I sobered up quick. That was a very bad idea.
can you tell me why i woke up in a diaper and combat boots?
Sooo...you're driving 6 hours for free booze?
Don't judge me.
Randomize
