whats the name of the jew you used to have sex with that lives on evergreen?
be more specific...?
I just want to hang out with her.
You're a liar. Why do I have to give you reasons you can't have sex with my mom? I hate you.
Sitting at a red light. Windows are down. I'm blasting Gaga's "Disco Stick" and doing an interpretive dance to it because I think I'm hilarious. Look to the left and see two Phi Delts that I know with their windows down. They are horrified. I am probably going to lose their Facebook friendships.
I saw those LARP guys in the street again. One is hot, the other looks like Corey Fieldman's retarded son.
im trying to make cookies in the george foreman
Bars not open yet, I feel like a desperate alcoholic wandering around outside.
I'm pretty sure you're not supposed to hit on someone with another guy's semen in your hair. not even at ihop.
shes a 6ft ginger. she brings nothing to the table except for awkwardness
Are you really this nice or are you just trying to get in my pants?
Both?
Still in Rome. Hooked up with frat boy from SoCal that's studying abroad. He said he was 1/8 italian. I'll take it.
Fighting the urge to throw up all over my little brothers jr high basketball bench. Welcome home aaron
"Where are you? Where are my keys? What is this guys name again? Why am I wearing two pairs of your pants?"
Just saw a rice crispy commercial and got emotional. I need to go home.
I guess the lesson here is that I shouldn't send nudes to elected officials.
I haven't gotten dressed in 4 days. God bless you, unemployment.
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