I figure if he loans me money i only owe him sex for the rest of the summer before i pay him back, right?
Im broke. I spend all my money on weed cigarettes alcohol and food. In that order. I cant even cut one of those because you know it'd be food. I already stopped getting my nails done just so i could support my bad habits.
so I woke up and found tortilla in my belly button
Handjob with gloves on results in friction burn. In case you've ever wondered
Like I said I'm looking on the bright side. The bright side just happens to be filled with penis attached to hot marines
Holy fuck, spaghetti burritos are the best idea I've ever had.
Let's drink?
Just because it's bacon vodka doesn't mean it's for breakfast.
Man...I want to get monumentally fucked tonight.
I was at the pharmacy picking up my herpes medication and the pharmacist asked if I had any questions about my medicine, looked at the bottle, and laughed. Insult to injury man.
I was like, booze is the closest thing I have to a father. Don't pour daddy down the sink
It will be too late. I will have fornicated with the enemy by then.
I just want an early 40-something dude who is vaguely unencumbered, professionally driven and wants to put me in a ball gag.
Just rode a bull topless for a free bar tap for a month
just turned another straight guy gay. Goddamn the church must hate me
I deleted your number after I found out you gave my brother head for drugs.
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