I took Valium worth by frank. I squabble
Li shadha you vin. It's phot out. I just ate a fried Oreo
I can see my step sister's thong. Don't know if I should let myself be turned on or not
operation harelip BJ is a go
I can't believe I just compared my penis to a St. Bernard.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There is a girl in my drunk limo who hasn't seen an uncircumcised penis. Hook me up with a picture.
I accidentally walked in the wrong house but I somehow left with a chicken leg. Good fucking night.
I asked for my Beats earbuds back and he sent me a pic of them tied around his penis. Now I miss both my great ear buds and his great dick
My night ended with a French cab driver offering me his sperm free of cost.
We don't have paper towels so I microwaved a spinach/egg sandwich thingy wrapped in toilet paper. Toilet paper. so that's how my day started.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He was on top and as he finished he yelled "I love gold" , so yeah I'm seeing him later tonight
I just want to have sex that doesn't end like a B-rated horror movie.
I say this out of love and friendship. Eat ice cream not the d.
I just started an apology with "so I'm sorry about throwing the Brita at your head last night..."
He sent me a snap with the dog tongue filter. I might have to bench him.
Just discovered I was so fucked up last night I called in sick to work... TWICE
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