Having an 'SDSU Mom' sticker is just like say 'Hi, my daughter has an std"
So my mom just called me into her room and showed me a condom wrapper she found in my room. "Oh that's from when I was like 16." I don't think that was very comforting.
imagine a blue Jetta with an ILLINOIS license plate that read JISLORD..... upon pondering it for 10minutes I came to the conclusion that J stood for JESUS and IF the license plate had enough room it would read "Jesus Is Lord"
If I had a nickel for every time my parents threatened to stop paying tuition I would be a very rich man. Rich enough to pay my own tuition.
i have wind burn on my face from my head hanging out the window of the cab vomitting
Apparently suggesting that she was the kind of girl who might be expected to kill someone's pets hurt her feelings...
No. I do not want to discuss your lesbian tendencies with my sister.
She still started it.
The port-a-pottys are knocked over so I have nowhere to sleep.
Ssssssssssshhhhhhhhhhhiiiiiiii!iiiiiiiiiitttttttttttttttssssssssssssshhhhhhhhooooooooowwwwwww. Letters for emphaSSIIISISEEEE!
I'm buying drugs in the library...And it's not even finals time. What has my life become?
I seriously think the toilet is the cleanest thing in their house. At least if I have to worry its not about that.
Don't blame me. I told you I didn't know if I had a key to those hancuffs.
Also, I would just like to reiterate my apologies for tearing up in the grocery store.
Totally reading about penis envy for my final exam
dude it was our first time and her hair caught on fire from the candles on the nightstand
There is no way that actually happened!
the smell of burnt hair covered up the sweaty sex smell.
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