Ooooh. That's not a mole. Uncomfortable.
she was screaming in french about how classy it was to be drinking wine. oh... she was drinking it out of the bottle. with a beer in her other hand while throwing up.
you asked "if this appropriate to take the the bathroom?" while holding up a bottle of vodka when you went to pee.
we found his I.D. in the upstairs bathroom...under a towel in a hidden pile of snacks from her kitchen
Dating After Heartbreak
Its not monday til someone throws up in the hallway
Being thankful with your family is one thing. Being thankful with your friends while getting drunk and smoking bowls while eating leftovers, priceless.
I hooked up with a 20 year old last night. I feel like a hocus pocus witch that sucked life from a child.
I BIT YOU IN THE DINING ROOM. I bit you and you crunched
I WANT TO. I JUST IMAGINE HIS BEAUTIFUL BLONDE HEAD INBETWEEN MY LEGS AND I BREAK DOWN AND START CRYING.
These Images Prove Chrissy Teigen is the Funniest Model Alive
Handcuffs are allowed in carry on luggage :) just checked
Drinking a pint every 8 mins right now. Power hour aint shit.
Trying doe a second hour and I.cant open my eyes
She showed up after 3 hours and proceded to make us all feel like resonable human beings. I dont know how she did it but she did it.
You were yelling at the mannequin and saying "DON'T LOOK AT ME"
The power of my boobs compel you
Well he offered to lick my asshole so...I'm not really worried about his interest level.