The two bassists just totally made out. I NEED MENNA'S RIGHT now.
ps i may or may not be wearing a sequined bra
I like the one of me you and her but you're looking at me...Total foreshadowing right there. I'm cropping it
thanks so much for stopping me from telling him i want to have sex with him while i proceeded to hookup with the air.
he told me not to treat him like a child and then started peeing off the trampoline
i just found this napkin with your number on it in my jacket pocket. it reads amy, drawing of a wine bottle and a house
And I would just like to take the time to say my boobs look great today.
She is the absolute last thing I would want to screw. Honestly. Fellating a porcupine. Higher on the list.
The staples of my diet are Labatt Blue, Xanax, and brick cheese.
I should have never moved out...
Let's just say we ended up at Denny's with a strippers shoe that we had to discreetly leave at the door to the strip club this morning
He held the kayak still so I wouldn't tip over while projectile vomiting. If that ain't true love, I don't know what is...
So it's safe to say that it's all down hill from here
Do you mean easy livin or downward spiral of alcoholism and disappointment
You knew you'd end up at his house the minute you emptied the bowl of condoms into your purse.
I know he's only a bandaid for my emotional disrepair, but he can stick me anytime!!
I don't wanna be 33 that's when Jesus died
Randomize
