Why don't you ever send me any naked pics
How can she be afraid to give you a blowjob? It's not like your penis is going to turn on her and eat her.
I wish my mouth had a period so that could be my excuse on those days I don't feel like giving head
So we were banging and she started puking all over my bed. I'm not sure what's worse, her puking, or that I felt the urge to start singing Flip-adelphia.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can blatently call girls sluts here and they think i'm speaking norwegian
I took your shirt off for you after you threw up on yourself, read you the ugly duckling, and then tucked you in. you better fucking love me, jackass.
If it's any consolation, your boobs looked awesome.
dude he passed out in the strip club on his birthday, WHILE he was getting a lap dance. That drunk.
He fingered me and now wants me to go get plan b because of it. WE'RE IN COLLEGE.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I AM NOT THE MAN IN THIS RELATIONSHIP.
It's shit like this that makes people think we're gay.
Well you were hungry, by then you cried and called yourself a basic bitch for eating crackers
I don't think I've ever met a guy with a bush bad enough that I would choose a cactus over it.
Your roommates will be treating you to many anecdotes about my intentions to have aggressive sex with you. I'm sorry in advance.
you pulled out seven eyelashes and made me count them multiple times whilst crying hysterically.
Alcohol and video games. A solid Friday night. Even before covid
Randomize