I showed him my bush... on skype.
It was like what a highfive between zeus and Jesus would sound like
drugs are my only escape from this reality. good thing I got it at a discount price last night
Do you ever wonder how many people have prayed for you to be a better person?
stopped you just in time from sledding down the roof.
I had to write an apology letter to security guards in the hotel so I didnt get kicked out
well what is some mechanical horse racing with out blow involved
You know me. Don't need roses, just dick and food.
Remember the 3 things that are off limits? They're fair game if you get here in the next 5 minutes
some people popped out of a houseboat and asked us to their party. their houseboat IS A WEEDBOAT. it is full of weed they grow weed. EVERYWHERE.
I always thought The Big Bang Theory wasa terrible show but that was before it came with blowjobs and pizza.
btw my frat has a search out for you. the "girl who threw up in the middle of the party" but it was on some fat girls. so thank you.
I told her my hands felt like they touched the sun, never been that stoned before
my goldfish that i got the day i lost my virginity just died. im terrified as to what this symbolically means for my sex life
Idk but when you think about it the last time I did bottomless mimosas I ended up getting my nipples pierced so it might be fair
Randomize
