Any of you guys fuck a 16 year old again? Because our front yard got fucked over high school style.
i mean you're really good at taking the morning after pill...so you could put that on your resume..
yeah, i think fast in a bad sitatuion and am able to react with appropriate measures
yay america 4th of july drinking game. take a drink every time you hear or see a firework, finish your drink for a mention of mj or the gosselins, a shot for the words democracy,hope, freedom, terrorism
I just found 3 condoms in my math textbook... in the probability section... Under dependent and independent events...
Have you seen my high heels that I wore out?
You mean the one that you threw at the parked cop car or the one in the microwave?
honestly I asked the same thing when we had our slip n slide and margarita party
can we get together and have a vodka water gun fight? i need to get som intense excersise/alcohol
Thanks for walking over, a conversation about David Bowie's dick as a muppet is exactly what my day was missing.
by the way whatever wisdom you imparted upon me last night was lost to whatever i smoked out of a beer can.
New fuck buddy and long time fuck buddy are carpooling home for thanksgiving. #10hrconvoaboutmyblowjobskills
I just woke up naked next to a GetGo sandwich and I can hear my cats are eating my combos. So that's my life.
me + whiskey = a bad person
so I think we need to change lawn care services...the guy woke me up by the pool while I was naked...told me he already picked up all the beer cans for us and gave me his number for the next time we party...
Sitting in a music store. There is a 40 something year old guy in a track suit, with a boner, and playing the ukelelie quite intensely.
thanks for thinking of me.
You ripped the leaves off the top of a pineapple then rubbed the rough skin part all over your face saying "this is how you mate with other species"
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