Forgive me I'm always horny when I wake up
she was so not down for the gang bang
it actually wasnt that awkward...i planned on saying hello and walking away..then she asked if i wanted to go to lunch and i looked at her chest and said absolutely
it feels like theres a golf ball between my legs. the sex was totally worth it tho.
the last thing i remember is inserting the sippy stray into the jack daniel's.
You started drinking at 2:30, did you really think you would be able to remember?
She sat on the toilet backwards so that she could hold onto the back part for balance. No she's not ready to go home.
I may have played more drinking games with my family this last week than all of freshman year...
Just turned down sex because it's a holy day of obligation, my mom would be proud.
I just took three of the most beautiful hits of my life. As elegant and smooth and delicate and graceful as figure skating
I woke up in your kitchen with my ID in my hand and my nails were painted electric blue. Dude.... never let me have fireball again.
Congrats on dating a convict, there's no fitbit badge for that one.
can we not compare my dick to a children’s folk tale
Can I just go to one establishment in which I haven't banged anyone ?
dude. I can hear the air.
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