I wish my cat could text because i would tell him that everything will be ok. and i wish he could send them back..but him have no thumbs. him no know what he would text with.
Could guys at least pretend I require some amount of money to be spent before I randomly go down on them?
just friend requested my arresting officer from last night. too soon??
her facebook pictures are like a timeline of all the guys she's screwed.
You unbuttoned your shirt and started walking down the center of the road screaming traffic stops for Enrique Iglesias.
the kid throwing up and laying face down on the deck just asked ME if I'M okay...
Our sex has gotten so much better since we broke up.
Last night I woke up and the national rep of his frat was sucking my toe.
I woke up naked under desk at her apt once during my freshman year. I should have known that friendship was of a different breed...
xanax give me strength to not ask where we stand with booty calls
He told me"I think your ready for this" and went into his closet whipped out a movie certiffied light saber.
My life has evolved from screwing randos, ok?
Just a couple of adults talking about cum shots at 8am on presidents day
On a scale of 1-10 I’m at biblical violence
She looks like a character that batman would try to kill, or something.
Randomize
