no but I have been chillin' like em' homeboys in the rainforest yo!
It wouldn't matter if you are Jesus Christ himself, you are not getting into the bar tonight
Bar. Show boob. Just one. Free drinks. Instant friends
Guys only need one. Little known secret. You're welcome.
I wish I could have two rating systems on iTunes. "This one is a 5 star. This one is only a 5 star when I'm baked."
He said "what's the haps". I don't know what the haps are but there goes his chances
woke up in a freezing tub of water at 6 am again. probably should stop the drunk baths
This is how I ended up being the slutty friend isn't it?
woke up outside on the porch naked surrounded by beer cans with a towl around my neck. i must be in heaven cause i've never seen this place before.
You didn't act like you were blacked out yesterday...
I didn't know
Oh my god. You have got to get off that breast feeding support group. They're on to you, dude.
I need a new best friend. Someone who drinks like a fish, hooks up enough to raise eyebrows, and isn't afraid to admit that masturbation is the second best way to spend time. Someone like me! Help me put up posters.
If it makes you feel any better, I'm eating a block of cheese...
I want to die, ON THAT, with that INSIDE ME. ironically, I sense that would be the only time I'd feel alive.
We’ve discussed sex and dinner. Like chicken nuggets while doing it doggie and watching tv.
Was cussing out our DD when one of the strippers takes him backstage. WTF
They call him magic hands is all I know.
Somethings are best left a mystery
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