his logic is that since hes already cheated on her w me its doesnt count
She wouldn't stop saying her own name. Like a damn pokemon.
her and i fucked to a michael jackson song and she had it memorized so she squealed every time he did
You're like the curious george of whores
He won't stop licking me..... im choosing your date next time.
There are six slides. In going to pee in five of them. You have to guess which one to go down. Agree?
Agreed.
She was kinda cute. So long as you don't mind neck tattoos and bad life choices.
These girls just walked into this party as reverse cowgirls... Wearing cowboy clothes all backwards
I was a little curious what "unspeakable" things he could possibly do to my feet
just saw a kid get pissed on buy a tiger at the zoo. His dad is rofling and the kid is crying. I think I have to go make a new friend
He threw up on my head while I was blowing him, and then I started barfing, and the kitchen floor was a mess. Believe me, he will never, ever live this down.
I just had a sex dream about orange juice, so there's that.
Can you come unlock the door? I just peed myself on the porch.
If you're going to be single forever, you should try the quesalupas at Taco Bell.
Sorry I banged your sister. But in my defense you ain't fucked me in a month. In fact I should get a medal for keeping it in your family.
Randomize
