So you refered to him as "monster dick"...not so much
people should stop making movies, we'll never top bio-dome.
Dude. Creed is coming in september.
We're no longer friends.
im shaking like a drug addict and i almost just shat my pants when i sneezed...no more patron for me
I had the spins so badly it was like I was having sex with 2 girls
God gave him joint rollers for hands
its the kind of pain that only someone with a fucking elephant on their head would understand. I'm never drinking again.
Hootey the Owl eats a mean pussy.
Um, OK. WTF?
The guy from the Halloween party. We finally hooked up. Went down in me for 45 mins. Came 4 times.
I SHITYOUNOT DAN JUST PUNCHED A DEER IN THE FACE. MID LEAP.
Why are there so many fucking Lambchop puppets hidden around my house?!
The ecstacy made me so dehydrated I started licking condensation off car windows
I'm trying to cause a divorce, your hooking up with a felon, I think we need Jesus.
This is a crisis. I had a huge crush on him in seventh grade and now his girlfriend is due to have his child on my birthday. HIS CHILD CAN'T BE BORN ON MY BIRTHDAY.
He fucked me harder than I've ever been fucked before and afterwards he started crying and profusely apologizing to god and baby Jesus for his sin.
just bought safety googles to wear so he can cum on my face and not in my eye. SAFETY FIRST!
Randomize