How much cunt could a cunt bag punch if a cunt bag could punch cunt?
I'm sitting the next couple hours out. Puking in a potted plant really put shit into perspective for me.
So basically i got outta bed and started peeing on the a/c unit..when my roommate tried to stop me i looked at him and said "i got this"
at what point did you see referring to the bartender as 'the white precious' a good idea??
What are the signs of a concussion? Please don't freak out.
Hey, if I can't get it and you're still alive, can you get the glass out of my foot? Happy Sunday.
It's only slutty if you don't have his number. Unless there's a full moon. Then anything goes.
MASS TEXT: Lets start a new tradition. Black Friday log pic contest. I'm waiting.
Yeah even if I got stabbed it would be worth it
How the fuck can he download so much porn but not know how to find the Skype app?
I'm about to have a threesome at the hotel where I had my quinceañera. Becoming a woman under this roof for the second time, whaaat
I'm on the Coaster ride of shame, currently sitting across two nice old ladies smelling like condoms.
Be quiet or buzz aldrin will come beat you up with science
We stole a Christmas tree from the student center and then decorated it with everything we stole from parties... All I have to say is Feliz Navidad!
I almost accidentally threw him out a window during sex last night.
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