Threesomes are so awesome. You even have company on your walk of shame :)
you kept lifting my skirt up, yelling "PANTY PARTY". needless to say, you're at the top of my father's shit list right now.
i just snorted my name. best moment ever
Didn't get to fuck her. Had to leave abruptly through window. Explain later.
I only know two things that kitchen floors are good for... sex and quesadillas that got dropped. You know, the five second rule
Sleeping with random people is the same as soul searching, right? Ps that wasn't a team name suggestion.
Y'all best leave this "I can only have a couple drinks" shit at the door. U don't drive to Yukon to have a shot. I'm getting u fuckers drunk.
we got kicked out of the bar last night for sneaking into the back kitchen and eating handfulls of cheese in the walk in fridge
As soon as I got there, you appeared out of no where, yelled "they're giving away free cigarettes!" in my face and then disappeared and I didn't see you the rest of the night.
This has to be the weirdest conversation I've ever had sober and in the middle of the day before.
It's not even noon and I've had 3 people call me a savage, one of them said it in reference to the blow job I gave them. So I guess you could say it's going to be a good weekend
Why do my weekends always degenerate into using my little brothers childrens board games for drinking games?
we f'd six times
f'd?
its sunday, i cant say fucked
So I justmade it back home and was greeted to a squirrel in my dorm... Last time I let my friends rent it out for a party.
Have you had an orgasm with an n95 mask on yet? It was better than being choked.
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