it sucked. he totally couldn't get it up. blamed it on never having cheated b4. Couldn't stop laughing. fuck.
Do NOT cum in me, on me, or in my bed.
No need to clean the puke on the driveway. The squirrel is eating it up.
So they're giving me a CT scan because I probably have a hernia. From getting a BJ from you. Really. This may be a pivotal moment in my decision to write a book about my life
All we did was argue about ponys and drug dealers
I might never shower again without beer.. I might also always drink naked
So our 'date' consisted of getting drunk off champagne at four and photo-bombing the shit out of tourist's pictures all over the city. Thoughts?
obviously he wasnt ready for this jelly and you can quote me on that
All i've had today is coffee and ketchup packets. I need a job like yesterday.
Ask me who hasn't showered since Sunday and just got cruised at the gas station on his way to work. I'm a terrible gay.
Would love to dress up in respectable attire and take you out somewhere nice and then do disgusting crude things in public
Btw. I have a sinus infection from doing cocaine in a portapotty at a Duran Duran concert. So, gimme a couple of days before y'all start the party.
He said a lot of nice things about me, it was really uncalled for.
You kept calling yourself a spider monkey... Then ran to the bathroom to "prepare for the main event"
I have hit the ultimate fuck buddy status. We pulled over in a construction zone to have a quickie.
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