there are definitely too many half naked pictures of me out there for me to ever be famous.
i spent my evening searching "the sims having sex" on youtube
we're no longer friends
we had sex three times last night.. but now im just wet from him crying on my stomach about how much he misses his ex.. awesome
I wonder if u can grow weed on Framville and sell it to Mafia Wars?
woke up to 35 texts all saying im cheating on her
me and last nights hook up spent two hr. figuring out a reply we went with i love you..
I'm officially my mother.. Smoking in the garage pretending to take the dog out in a big ugly jacket
Just saw a woman in a hospital gown with a Steelers jersey on top smoking a cigarette while hooked up to an IV outside of the hospital. I love Pittsburgh.
No amount of marijuana is enough to justify blood on my ceiling
He has a landing strip. I repeat he has shaven himself a landing strip. HELPPPP!
not much just sitting outside his bathroom door naked eating cheetoes. You?
He told me to fuck off at some point in the night. I think it was right before he jumped out of a moving car trying to get to another bar and made Abby cry.
When you put it that way it sounds like my vagina is a parking garage to be monitored by security guards
It will be like a scavenger hunt.. only we're looking for places to have sex.
So I'll bring my machete and we can smoke your shit.
Out of context, that is a hilariously scary message.
Just met my future wife. Please dont fuck her.
Randomize
