I must be too annoying 4 u.
She challenged me to a game of rock-paper-scissors for her virginity. I love this girl.
She fell out the car soaking wet and screaming "im wearing a fedora!" then tryed to seduce him on the front lawn in front of his middle aged neighbor
No, this is non-alcoholic oatmeal.
Then you started screaming that this was the first time you did e and that you had a 4.8 gpa, that was right before you almost suffocated between that one girl's tits.
Um please remind me to tell you what happened tonight. It involves wine, pain killers and firing a handgun in our apartment. Legit might be hiding from the cops this weekend.
I just want to like fall into a pit of hot wings beside a keg of yingling and eat my way to freedom
You chugged 6 beers in a row and then outed your boss at a party last night.
I'm hoping you were seen by someone holding a frozen turkey at 230 in the morning
Would it be sad if I made a blanket fort to get drunk in till the power came back?
A party without a piñata is not a party I want to attend.
Tbh you just need to fuck it out like I don't know another solution
I can feel the shame as I walk down your hallway.. good night
Just finished 151. Eating nutella off a spoon. Bring condoms.
I wanted to make my beer stronger so I poured vodka in it. Why god....why
Randomize
