I wanna blow your doors off so bad right now.
Doors?
Rock your world. Blow you out. Skeet skeet.
It's cold our but I feel like a very blazed penguin
Do you remember trying to eat gravel when we were walking back to the dorm?
All that matters is I got the megaphone home safely
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
they wouldn't let me take the pitcher of beer on the ferris wheel
get ready to load up the weird cannon and blow a load of buck-wildness all over the place people
Remember how he wouldn't sleep with me "out of respect"? Well, Mr. Respect just fingered me in a parking garage.
I was woken up in my old house by the new residents ... I don't even have a Key anymore
My feelings for him are donzo molonzo but I can't turn down a pierced penis...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's sad that I'm more proud of my Twitter account then my resume
also. got fucked to usher last night. dunno if thats a new high or a new low
Was it at least a good usher song?
I am now picking what guy I will hang out with based on how many Pokémon they live near.
I just don't understand why your parents aren't supporting your dreams of being a medieval weapon smith.
I have seen you puke and 5 mins later rock my world. So there is hotness there that average people will never see..
Currently standing at the bus stop in just a pillowcase and its fucking snowing
Randomize