Yep, it's a dick on our front door. Intentional?
let's skip the party, and just play drunken wii, again. its time to give my vag a break.
She was wearing a "Got Beer" hat and your bed had necco wafers all over it the next morning. Another story for the grandkids.
my mom just texted me to let me know that Hooters is hiring
i wish my mom had big dreams like that for me
she just punched a dude and called him a peasant for not drinking fast enough in flip cup.
Also, I'd like to add that that I'm not quitting my job, my boss fed me shots at 11 am this morning.
when she first told me she hooked up with him my initial response was to shout "WE HAVE SOMETHING IN COMMON!"
Nothing bonds a father and daughter like washing her puke off the front steps
Bitch, he is not your friend and this is not Bravo. Get in this car before you get smacked
They just dared her to tape flip flops to her tits. Entertainment value cannot be found like this in any other part of America.
Please write a memoir and name it "Game Boy and Dick Stuff"
Just do it. I grew some lady balls and did it last year. It's your turn. Time to show what you're made of. Hit it or quit it.
So some drunk guy just tried to convince me with all of his passion that bacon is a color
CUM CAME OUT OF MY NOSE. MY SINUSES ARE ENTIRELY FUCKED UP NOW BC OF THE CUM TRAVELING IN PLACES IT SHOULD NOT HAVE.
my roommate woke me up with head. more awkward than it sounds.
Randomize
