My moms helping me unpack but im getting a little nervous because I dont remember where i put my dildo
There could not be a more unattractive person. She just told me her period was so bad that she got sick. I think my penis retracted and killed himself
I understand. Hypothetically what should one do after throwing up in the shower?
Why does my right nut always hang lower than my left nut?
i like to finish this college football season knowing that not once have I had to masturbate to erin andrews
They wouldn't let me go to sleep at the police station while I was waiting to bail u out. YOU OWE ME
I'm not holding out much hope. She met me in a nighclub when I was arguing with the cigarette machine
You know how hard it is to drive a dirtbike down a road with 2 plants of weed on your lap. Fucking hard
and PS, please don't fuck in the corn maze, k?
I just saw a guy in a sombrero and holding an inflated blow-up doll in all her "glory" get escorted out of the mall. I hate Marley.
I'm just gonna use that pot butter as dip for chips. That's fat, American AND stoner!
I'm having a hard time eating my sandwich knowing how many different buttholes my hands were in last night.
Lol for real, I'm Kylie Jenner "this is my year of realizing things" right now
Apparently she hired a private investigator when he took out a restraining order on her. So the answer is no, I didn't hit it.
It was a strange night. I made out with his college roommate and said "do you care?" beforehand.
Randomize
