But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
I don't know which is more embarrassing, the fact that I shat on the floor today or that I told you about it.
so i was just informed that i sang that song "pop that pussy ayyy pop that pussy" at the halloween party saturday. iembarrassing.
i just put a booger in my mom's hair and i just needed to tell someone.
I got kicked out because I puked again I'm on the fire truck outside
She started ignoring us once we told her we were out to celebrate your abortion. Who knew strippers could be judgemental?
He had me saved in his phone as "Dick Socket". Lets see if I ever fuck him in a bathroom again.
The staff doesn't like it when you try and take your wheelchair for a joy ride since I've been waiting for an hour and a half.
The whole movie was ruined when some chick started laughing with what you could tell was QUITE the mouthful. This of course made the guy laugh harder.
Dude if I call tonight please answer and just say "NO, dont do it."
BAT SHIT CRAZY
It's you're fault, even though I never called
He ate me out while Space Jam was on. My life is complete.
Its not often you get to say, "The security guard at my job is my new drug dealer," but as of last night, I get to say it.
I miss the days where our biggest worries were who was gonna win battle shits.
I just saw a kid on iowa campus story that looked like the guy i made out with on spring break.
So it's official...my sex life has improved since Pokemon came out...
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