Last night we were drunk and talking about rude things, I mentioned felching and had to explain it to everyone. Everyone was disgusted and asked how I knew about such filth and I told them you told me. Don't get mad. Also a quck heads up, you might get gifts of straws at work,
if you do not get any action from him tonight, I am personally walking my drunk ass over there grabbing his tongue and sticking it in your mouth. this is getting ridiculous
Just heard the garage door open and I immediately sprinted to the laptop to erase history, even though I haven't watched porn today...I believe Pavlov now.
I wonder sometimes what your vagina thinks about you.
Ya after that i took a dump on a car... We're definitely partying with him again
slow down on the beer.. we don't need another pentabong projectile hot dog incident
All I know is that either you or I told a black guy that he looked like usher and he was sexy and that is our confession
I hear sloppy seconds go great with fried rice
We were escorted through the guys dorm by 5 kids with nerf guns and zelda shields. I felt like the president with a fucked up secret service squad.
On her way to bed she said, "If you have sex on the couch, just move my blanket" Needles to say, we moved the blanket
I don't care how hot he is. I will not strip for him to country music.
Thanks for the reference. If your boss hires me, I'll buy you a drink.
If my boss hires you, I'm going to need it.
the last thing i heard from her was "i wanna get fucked by a stranger" and i haven't seen her since
So Blakes coming home... so if youre like fingerbanging the shit out of yourself on the kitchen table...wrap it up
Am I the only person in the world that does not give a shit about the avengers?
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