suddenly SuperBad didn't seem so funny anymore...she did have her period on my leg.
laughing at 16 and pregnant while fucking w/o a condom....
i always knew you were classy
Just so we're clear. I'm still making jello shots and bringing them to the bar in my purse. I don't care if its half off margaritas. Don't want anyone thirsty
In all fairness I didnt see your dick because it was already in her
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just watched a guy puke off his bike. Beyond impressed. He didn't even swerve
We jumped on a random trolley because total strangers offered us free vodka. We're not even on the route map as far as I can tell. I see now how those people died in "Hostel"... we deserve whatever happens to us tonight.
I just stood on my roof naked pouring vodka onto my garden. sweet dreams
Because her vagina is one of those illusive black holes that leads to a parallel universe where he is king and the sea is made of beer! That is why they are together!
Well we're either getting a bunny or I'm getting you pregnant in about 12 days.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I guess I'm open to more types of dick now
I am buying anal lube, an enema, and a bag of kit kats. What part of this is compelling the Walgreens woman to tell me to "be well".
My boss want to throw me an everclear birthday.
So I came to the conclusion that who ever pour my ever clear out saved my life
Tonight’s your last chance for a danger free blowjob.
He showed his fake to the cop and was like "does the coloring look off to you?"
Randomize