you dont know how to answer ppls txts anymore?!?
im sorry, i don't get text messages.
oh man you're gonna hate me when you log onto facebook. remember i love you
Just watched 1 guy 1 jar with my mom. Awkwardville...
I HAVE FLAVORED BLOW. THIS SHOULD NOT EXISIT.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
and then he proceeded to take what he called, a whip cream shower.
We JUST got rid of the new years fatties at my gym and now the spring break fatties are here. goddamn.
Also, no joke, I think that raccoon hair is still in my eye from last night.
This 35 year old just told me that he was headed to the dance floor and it was about to get real dangerous......was that an invite?
Two months ago an unknown man was in my bed and now he is my boyfriend and he has 1.6 million in the bank and he buys me things because I only have $4.35 in my bank account
It could happen to you too!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
im watching blue is the warmest color at the music box and this dude is literally masturbating 3 feet in front of me
I mean when you laced a shot with $200 worth of cocaine I could see why you'd be mad when somebody drops it
There is a man in my bed with "new zealand" tattooed on his back. Wtf happened last night?
I mean, you've had my nipples in your mouth now, so I think we've reached a certain level of friendship.
He just blew a .079. Jesus loves him THAT much.
On cleanup... i've counted 94 solo cups so far.. oh, and i found a miniature top hat in the microwave
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