he's the Salvador Dali of pubic shaving
so she asking me "is it okay to have dangling labias?"
Anyone who says sunshine brings happyness has never woken up with the worst hangover of their life to their window being open and it being a bright shinny day
if it walks like a guido and talks like a guido, i'm gonna fuck it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He busted his lip while trying to keep from passing out in the pool. The hotel people don't seem to be too concerned that we're passing around a bottle of SoCo at 11 am.
Under someone's bed. Not sure whose. I think they're sleeping in it.
That little tingle vodka gives me in my esphagus is what lets me know I'm still alive.
And then we made hashbrowns with vodka and queso.
This is the fourth day in a row I've walked outside in the same pajamas. I think the neighbors have finally given up on judging me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Because she seems like the type to give it up for a box of fruit rollups.
Just text the random number in my iphone notes that was entered at 1am. Should be interesting.
I am the Angelina Jolie to his Billy Bob Thorton. We just don't work.
The power of the half flaccid cock, and to think, I thought I was just playing accordion in front of her Vagina!
P.s. I wore your shirt today and it has your blood all over it, but I am at a funeral home and they are using embalming fluid to get your blood stains out right now.
Can I say it was a great night out of town? Fucking my co-worker in the hotel bed while my best friend is fucking his friend on the floor and a random guy is laying in the other bed meanwhile we are all passing a joint back and forth
Randomize