we sang "a whole new world" together. either he's my gay best friend or the love of my life.
he is training for a marathon but can't last more than five minutes on top. worst tuesday night ever
Taking a shot for every status related to the patriots losing. Hello hospital.
I made an oral joke and he laughed... That's when I realized I wasn't Daddy's Little Girl anymore.
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Of course I was flustered, I had a lot of penis in my face.
I think the imperative here is that I literally knocked down a sorority house with the force of my dick.
Most senic walk of shame ever. This is why you go to school in Hawaii.
yyyea i think im gonna go get a bowl and play skyrim. And by bowl i mean something i can throw up in, not weed
Somehow she talked me into getting my dick pierced, weird first date.
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Update: just imagined being dirty talked to in an Irish brogue and I think my vagina became a sentient being.
I made out with a guy so that I could get ahead in the bathroom line, totally acceptable
If you can give me an orgasm, you'll get a trophy.
So I scratched the whole boyfriend plan and got wasted. Wanna try again tomorrow?
I have wine with a bendy straw bitches I can do fucking anything
There way too many people in that club who have had their dick in me
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