I'm going to use my one free fuck up card tonight.
What'd you do?
Its more like what im about to do.
Fuck, operation next sex victim is on as soon as i get back. Do not sleep with that red head, nobody likes accidental ginger babies.
he sent her a picture of his penis to show that he "trusts her" or some shit like that..well she showed it to me, and let me just tell you..it looked like a freaking slug or something. creepiest penis i've ever seen. hands down
We need to either start getting drunk more often or one of us need to start doin drugs
Wtf? Why?
I want awesome conversations to show the world.
dude,it's memorial day.not getting wasted=you're a terrorist
The only thing worse than listening to you two fuck all night was waking up and smelling bacon and there not being any left.
I hate nights where "I found my underwear" can be considered a victory.
he told her to call him "Frog Legs" and she still fucked him and not you.
I left two shots of jager for you guys when you wake up from your death. Do with it as you wish
I'm not liking this ratio of moving to blowjobs...
He ripped off his socks and ran around the basement barefoot. His feet turned black. Then he chugged Parmesan cheese. He chugged dry cheese dude.
Dude for real though, we gotta stop getting hammered and kissing gay guys.
Nope. Too much basics going on right now. I'm tying you both up and throwing you to the vibrating sexy toy sharks. You shall either sink or get off gloriously.
I'll pass on that plan. The lack of my penis in new vaginas is no where on the itinerary.
A sultry night of tacos and sex sounds nice. Should I bring home milk?
Randomize
