"Monday" is guna come over...
but its Thursday?
yeah, but she cant make it.Monday can...so there ya go
Fucking love it maybe bedazzle some baby seals? Make them cuter? Who would club a bedazzled baby seal? Only a fucking monster.
you know you made it when your beer pong table is made from imported italian hardwood
I'm really tired of your booty call eating my fruity pebbles.
i cant answer while inside this church craft show. so unless you're outside with my engagement ring and a nonfat gingerbread latte, it'll have to wait.
All you need to know is that isn't jizz
I just realized in a weird reversed way I hustled a stripper last night
His front door was open but I INSISTED on army crawling FOOT FIRST under the garage door. Then I peed the bed.
I am pretty great at coffee and mistakes
Its okay. I just know how you can text with your hands cuffed behind you back, so I had no idea what "oh shit" meant.
It will pretty much be equal to the feeling I had when you let me hold your dick while you were peeing, or when I graduated high school!
I KEEP THINKING INAPPROPRIATE SEXUAL THOUGHTS ABOUT YOU AND I AM SORRY.
she was just meowing in the corner eating frozen chicken nuggets
Security showed up because apparently we were fucking too loud.
As your roommate I can attest that y'all do indeed fuck rather loudly
My life is far to together for someone who's such a hot mess inside
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