there are some really hot girls on the bus. i want to lips them
is sleeping with your Political Science professor Politically incorrect?
Was he helping you 'cram' for your final, or just giving an oral exam?
She made me repeat after her: "I take responsibility for what I put in my own mouth."
i just found five singles in my underwear?! im suspicious but delighted none the less
All of my current injuries can be related back to sex.
Its like they don't get that I only talk to them before homecoming, thanksgiving, or any other time I go home. I love highschool girls.
I gave you a 45 minute blowjob. You were inside me for 3 minutes. I'm going to need you to get your shit together.
In less than 3 minutes we had 3 security guards running after us
This from the guy I found eating salad out of a pot lid in his boxers on his porch last night.
Adderal just makes me love life. I want to do so much. I just can't stop thinking about all the wonderful opportunities we have and how lucky we are and I want to make a difference in the world. I just have to reign in my brain and convince it that changing the world starts with a college degree, which depends on studying for these finals.
You were greeting everyone with " Hi I'm Jess show me your dick" whether they were dudes or not.
I'm in too deep with Breaking Bad. I realized I've altered my Tinder likes to people that either look like Jesse or work in a school's Science department.
I'm pretty sure i doubled the number of dicks I've ever touched, last night.
i cant hook up i'm covered in egg rolls
See I am maturing. I just got in from my DRIVE of shame......
Randomize
