So after your 27th or so beer, you gave me songs you want to have used if you're ever on intervention.
But I thought everyone had breakup sex?
I am so hungover and cant move but craving a Wendys frosty so bad. I might have to watch 2 girls 1 cup just to settle the urge
She tried catching cigarette ashes on her tongue like snowflakes.
LOVE ME LIKE A KANGARO LOVES A POUCH YOU DUMB CUNT
I've got to stop giving the gift of vagina for every occasion. I'm exhausted.
Februarys looking very promising in the vaginal department
By the way, I'm pretty sure your husband is publicly advocating more BJs for my husband, via Facebook.
If eating a cheesesteak naked doesn't make me feel better, then I don't know what will.
She needs to go. She is like the Yoko Ono of our group.
Judging by his bulge. This guy is going home with me. Who doesn't want a dick that looks like it used to be a pillar in Rome.
If there's anything my liberal arts education has taught me, it's belligerence.
lol I'll trade you jello for a tampon
what a trade!
Pretty sure the waitress here is concerned about well being bc I've been here drinking by myself for 3 hours. If only I could show here FB so she'd know I'm not alone...
Have you ever woken up and said a thank you prayer to the beer gods for allowing you to wake up in the morning and still have the ability to walk and talk? Because we should.
Randomize
