The answer is no. Its an illegal search n seizure!
Who would have guessed that ordering a vodka lemonade at Roscoe's was code for I want a hand job
It was like a fairy tale, until he tried to put it in my ass...
i don't know what the guinness world record is for longest time eating nothing but skittles but i'm going on six days
just upper decked a verizon store cause they don't cover against "getting phone crushed by a keg." had to pay 175 for a new one
waking up outside has become so normal, the paper boy knows to set the paper next to me
i also performed surgery on a chicken burrito from what i can tell from my scissors
Finding a keg in our kitchen would be like god personally high fiving each of us.
The bet was for naked jumping jacks. And it back fired, she just laughed at all the slapping noise.
I totally forgot about finals week. im the worst adderall salesman ever.
some dude just accurately guessed my height and bra size.. that is cup AND inches around. creepy, yet impressive
We're doing a team debriefing of Saturday night in group text right now. As 75% of the female presence at that party we saw some shit.
May he have a McRib induced stroke and lose the feeling in his tastebuds.
Just got a 15 minute lecture from a drag queen about how bisexuality doesn't exist. Cher would be so disappointed in her.
i smell like vinegar and tequila i can feel the old people behind me judging
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