Don't bone anyone, just think of ur vibrator lol
HHaaaaaaaaa mmmmn vibrator
It's not real sex if he's just convulsing inside of you.
Um....I woke up to a lipgloss covered bottle of Jack daniels in my arms..
You've kissed worse.
...So a 6 ft tall drag queen in heels I would kill for just told me I have a dunkable ass. I'm confused...but I'll take any compliment I can.
i almost hope i AM knocked up so i can ruin the rest of his life
By the way, we're gonna have to get a new rug for the livingroom i kinda started ours on fire...
Last thing I remember is beer bonging sangria. Dear God.
Also. When I die, I'm gonna have them put me in the casket naked and then have an open casket funeral. That will be my last chance to make people uncomfortable.
I just rode a horse than walked onto my property in boarshorts, flip flops, and holding a 40. What do I win?
I got sucker punched while I was making out with some girl...I think my molar might have flown into her mouth
Then years and years after that I will send you a picture of my warped vagina from all the kids that I had.
I gave him a bj as a thank you for helping. I think that's good.
And by "I love him" I mean "I want his tongue down my throat.
MDMA, margaritas, mashed potatoes and ice cream aren't keto Kristin
yeah....try hearing them in person. it sounds like two muppets going at it
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