can you pick up canola oil? she lives by wegmans
who is canola oil?
you're an idiot.
what you doin?
I just woke up vomited poured myself a chocolate milk and turned on the peoples court. you?
reread what you just wrote and reconsider your entire life
Bouncy castle Catalina wine-mixer race for the cure. It will be as fun as it sounds
In other news, someone I've had sex with won jeopardy last night.
One time she made a chronological chart for the guys she has given blow jobs to, I shit you not.
they had to take the Corona's out of the fish tank because they wouldn't fit with the mini replica of the roman coliseum in there. so we drank the Corona's. does beer have an expiry date?
Well. I guess talking about me stealing your wife may not be in the list of legit conversations
The last thing I remember was naked hot tub and taking a shot and using the hot tub water as a chaser. Not acceptable.
I lost all of my bathing suit tops.. This is both a success and a failure
She fell off the bed and giggled until she passed out naked. It was really weird.
Probably not gonna date her.
This place is full of unfortunate mustaches.
…wtf were in those pills mom gave me
8 minutes into the New Year and and I've already sent a nude...new year, new me?
you're telling me you don't want to have sex 30,000 feet above the earth?
Is there a way to use porn to inspire him to have dirty thoughts? Like the movie Inception except with more lube and orgams?
Randomize
