I think the fact that my first kiss is now in a porno says a lot about why my life is the way it is
What baked good do you think says thanks for being a great tutor, lets bang?
At first i thought she was a sexily dressed toddler. but not in a pedophile way, in a really on drugs way
This little shit keeps eating the playdoh so i replaced the green with wasabi from work. Wonder what his parents are gonna think when he burns his soft palette?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think you were giving a sex seminar on your kitchen table last night.
No my first time having an orgasm with you will not be on face time
I just spilled grey goose in my hair. You could say I keep it classy for the family Christmas parties.
Made my roommate send me tit pics so I could send them to someone because I didn't want to move.
Finally hooked up with her. She bought me tacos after because "she can do better in a bed". You're gonna be my best man.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have a sixth sense for large penises and lack of morals
I woke up to rachel asking "did anyone else fall out of a tree last night?"
You kept apologizing to your car for talking behind its back
Just boned her on my desk. on top of my term paper. take that professor dipshit
so let me get this straight you just stared at his boner all night?
All she said was "Do me by Friday."
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