That's why you don't touch shit after fingering somebone
Her gag reflex was as absent as a father figure must have been in her childhood
Just fyi NOT a good idea to drunkenly insert your NuvaRing after chopping jalepeno peppers
Just had another dream about being on Real Chance of Love. I think it's a sign.
Hey man your outta milk
How the hell do you keep getting in my apartment?!
I turned down free cocaine. I both respect and regret and that decision.
She stopped mid-blowjob to introduce herself to us
You know it's time to cut back when your unemployed drug dealer roommate tells you that you party too hard.
Just puke n rally. People can't judge, it's syllabus week.
HELP! How do I get paint off the dog?
I have no idea what those words in that order meant, but if you go to Florida send me pics of strippers
I've been continuously high for the last 48 hours, and just broke my 4th vibrator. Coincidence? FIND ME A MAN I BEG OF YOU.
she grabed my junk and started making lightsaber noises
I wonder if you could get her in a metal bikini
I just saw elmo dancing with gumby. The bars at 7a.m. are AWESOME.
I don't know if I'm dying or this is just a mild inconvenience
Randomize
