guy from last night has fluorescent crocs in his closet. judging by the rest of his clothes he doesn't wear them in an ironic way
i also saw a trio of peacocks walking along a sidewalk in hollywood today. i really hope im not tripping.
No, we just ended up walking around in his pool high and singing songs by The Wiggles.
you tried to clear everyones facebook status so that yours would be the only one on everyones home page
I'm giving up shame for lent. Here come the best 40 days and nights of my life.
Call me pathetic, but saying "tits for ireland" is working out really well on chatroulette today.
we were hanging out in his room and he decided to play WoW.. so i took off all my clothes while he wasn't paying attention and laid on his bed and started playing with myself.
did he notice?
of course he didn't notice.. he was playing a fiesty level 1 fucker that wouldn't give up..
Sorry I didn't take you making out with him all night as a hint you wanted nothing to do with him...
Drunk Sam makes promises that Sober Sam can't keep
I don't have any plans for New Year's except watching anime and drinking until I can't read the subtitles anymore.
Why the HOLY HELL is my dog on my roof??? Sam?? Why is the dog wearing my pants
If my vagina were a person, it just ran a marathon.
Should I apologize for the loud sex I had in his living room? Because I'm not going to.
Definitely not.
I'm eating chicken wings naked and hungover at 10am... Happy bday to me
just threw up in a gas staton parking lot in front of a father and son. stared them in the eyes and finished like a boss
Randomize
