I have a hot bod, but my face sucks, what can i do?
Hot guy, man whore rep, huge crush, alcohol that will fuck you up. I fail to see how this could go wrong
I think I'm maturing; i was gonna watch porn and then take a nap but i motivated myself to put my laundry in first.
I just spit my fake tooth out at a customer. I think he thought it was my bubble gum though so it's ok.
we were naked in his bed and he told me all about what a "baller" alexander the great was.
ok watching intervention on tv. when i hit rock bottom - i wanna be THIS chick.
I just realized I've stolen a hat from every guy I fucked. Except the last one. Maybe there is hope for me.
just peed in the tub. didnt notice the passed out drunk guys there until a minute in
My roommate is trying to suck beer out of the rug.
I don't like him near enough to give up day drinking AND my prostitute costume
He hasn't responded, but he probably just jizzed in his shorts again, so I'll give him time.
Why put me through the conflicting battle of being happy for your vagina but sad for my vagina for no reason ahole
It's 4am & this guy is asleep with his junk still inside me..really rethinking my life
Like I'll lick your nuts to make you feel better if you don't get it
Thank god you don't know my other address I'm safe for now
Awww you know you would like it if I found u
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