Are you seriously drinking already? It's 11AM. Still morning.
I'm going by McDonald's time. And since they stop serving breakfast at 10:30 and start serving lunch, it is now afternoon.
bubblegum was invented today. we're getting drunk. end of story.
My mom just asked me if I was gay in front of my gf
CAUTION: TWINS DO NOT HAVE TWIN PENISES.
I do. There's a bald headed guy whose kinda hot. I might rub his head. I've only had 2 beers
He came out in cowboy boots and underpants holding a beer while he hugged my mom. I love Montana.
I should not be in class today. For the professors sake.
On that note if you see a hobo smiling with a pack of cigarettes and an AMP energy drink, that was my good deed for the day
But today feels so special with katie getting herpes and me cleaning my room. Good things are happening.
She is currently expressing her joy for "bad to the bone" through interpretive dance...
I just found a weed leaf in my leg hair..
Just sitting here contemplating the meaning of life.
So you're drunk waiting for the bus.
New Orleans is just like you. Dirty but beautiful and will always have a special place in my heart
Our love of vodka is more proof than a maternity test
Look, I need your help, not your judgment.
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