my roommate and her friend got reaallllly high last night and it looks like they played scrabble. one of their words is "nippal"
Just saw a girl leaving CVS on her bike with a case of beer. She tried to ride one handed with the case under her other arm and fell over off the sidewalk. I'm glad to see someone else's life is a bigger joke than mine.
i believe i can now do shots of gasoline with no chaser. its been that kind of summer.
you kept saying 'its nothing a six pack wont fix' as they loaded you into the ambulance.
I don't see why you're so upset, it's not like you were wearing pants either.
This is a whole other level of drinking. Like the I used to eat paste with these people kinda drinking.
i feel like this needs to be a 'lose some teeth' kind of weekend.
Wine floats aren't as good of an idea as they seem
We were debating whether rain water is clean enough to drink. I won when he started throwing up.
As I sit on the toilet at 4 am I realize tonight could have gone a lot better
I'm chatting on my fake OkCupid account and watching Lion Witch & Wardrobe on my second screen. Hail me, King of the Creepers
I'm by the tree and the Dora the explorer balloon .. Look for the Dora the explorer balloon
He woke me up because I was snoring and went for a second round. First time I'm happy that I snore
She has no problem going ass to mouth, but won't eat the pizza crust. I don't get it.
Literally just took 6 shots in the shower..I’ve got this.
Randomize
