halloween costumes for girls are easy, slutty teacher, slutty cop, slutty nurse, etc...
exactly, that's why i want something interesting
slutty neuroscientist?
I just hemmed my dress for halloween, never felt more like a man
Hey its bob the builder. Where did you go?
im drinking italian dressing and watching dexter. its 230am. lets never drink on sundays again.
You should get a handy in the street again, just to prove you've still got it.
Oh, I'm just lighting tennis balls and WD-40 on fire, what are YOUUU doing?!
Only sluts go out in this weather carpe diem boys
You don't understand. If you watched a video of the shenanigans that occurred in my life over the past 48 hours you would gasp worse than the girl who witnessed me puking in my bag at the children's hospital
I accidentally told my mom "the reason I didn't answer your call is because my phone was in my pants, on the floor"
Because making bad decisions is what makes our house great and I don't plan on changing that anytime soon.
I don't understand why you're so excited, it's my vagina not yours.
Alex I've come up with a new medical condition. dick depression. it's a real thing and I have it
Do you think this 2 hour Amazon delivery thing works on vibrators? Cause that would be clutch
I just did my taxes to sober up, I'm THAT hungover
His dick smelled like strawberries...it was awesome.
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