My vagina is so ashamed right now. It won't even look at me.
Would we rather be in rehab with the drug addicts or the girls with low self esteem?
just because you are in college doesnt mean its okay to pregame easter mass.
You unbuttoned your shirt and started walking down the center of the road screaming traffic stops for Enrique Iglesias.
Idk if you've ever had the pleasure of 1. Vomiting on a sidewalk - at 3 in the afternoon 2. Vomiting nachos or 3. Vomiting nachos out of your nose but really I do not advise any of the above.
i found him! he's on the front porch using a bag of potting soil as a pillow. i forgot i left him there.
I want someone to sweep me off my feet and you want someone to fuck you on the kitchen table. They're both perfectly logical needs.
I went to bed at ten on a Friday night I have virtues to spare
Nothing like drunkenly buying a pregnancy test at 8 am to get out and realize your nip was out the whole time.
She was way too drunk so I dropped her off at her house and smoked a huge blunt with her mom.
Got myself invited to boss's family dinner party, drank too much, and fucked boss's brother in his parent's house. Just another Wednesday.
i'm not so sure everythign we did last night was legal...
Dude \nSo embarrassed \nJust sent a snap to my boss john and noticed my vibrator was right beside me
I have seen you puke and 5 mins later rock my world. So there is hotness there that average people will never see..
Your ex spoke highly of your penis and it’s skill. I’m interested in learning more about it ;-)
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