We walked 2 miles, legit 2 miles, and purchased 7 half gallons. One for each of us. Intense
I told them you could toss a salad like wolfgang puck
Bts the comment you were making during that picture was "look we have penises"
I made her dinner: Beefaroni with grated parmesan cheese on top. Luckily she showed up drunk and gave me head, "For spending so much time preparing."
He saw my tits then looked up and yelled thank you jesus as loud as he could
The homeless ppl in LA are great. Theres sum guy that makes all of his clothes out of tighty whitey underwear. He makes bags out of them 2. Presumably 2 hold more underwear.
I woke up on a futon in some strangers house. They were eating pizza and told me everything was going to be fine.
Walked by a shop giving away free donuts this morning. Best walk of shame ever
4pm on a Sunday....roomate fucking like a wildabeast while I have a organic chemistry study group in my kitchen.
Hate is such a strong word! I prefer to think that you strongly dislike me due to the honesty I show towards your routine shortcomings of success in life.
I tried to break it off with the married one. He offered to pay off my car.
The side bitch struggle is real.
I hung my underwear from the tree in his front yard. Consider my territory marked.
He asked me for a pic so I sent him a pic of my boyfriends dick.
Speaking of, what are you doing next weekend? I'm going to a rope bondage seminar and may need a partner if my date bails.
On another note, I think my upstair neighbor is having sex. How awkward would it be if I showed up to her door with a bag of Chipotle?
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