Facebook is used to stalk your friends, Twitter is used to stalk celebritie=s, and Myspace is used to stalk underaged girls. Everything else is porn. T=he Internet in a nutshell.
Fail #1 I puked off the balcony onto the balcony below us and when I tried to pour water on it in the morning to wash it off it just went all over their deck. Sorry room 1342 but welcome to Jamaica
We're upstairs smoking....the password is pineapple
I give you the lube, you make me the mac and cheese, that's a pretty fair deal I think.
There was no way out of it, seeing as I left my photo ID right next to the vomit.
Let's discuss options later this evening. I'll draw out said options and compare and contrast the "accessibility" of the costume for quickies. Because you never know. Halloween is full of surprises. I'll also compare practicality, level of skank, and creative features.
Just threw up. It looks like I may have swallowed a cigarette.
I pull out like 90% of the time, but that's just to make art.
Dude. That is just waaaay to much random to process after that tequila battle.
Bad news? she threw her drink in his face, left her phone at the club, and disappeared. I found her laying in bed with the bottle she stole from our VIP service. Good news is she's asleep and I have the bottle, come home
You got in the cab and told the cab driver "we only have seven bucks so you better drive fucking fast".
You drunkenly hook up with 5 people in one night and suddenly everyone tries to party with you.
It's like everything I need in life within a five block radius: booze, toilets, dogs, dicks.
So, I never imagined myself puking on the side of the road at 10:30 this morning to Lynyrd Skynyrd but here I am.
Woke up in the hospital naked with my id's taped to my chest. Also apparently puked on two guys, two girls and an escalade (at the same time). Good night.
Randomize
