I feel like I spend my weeks apologizing for my weekends.
The straight man in me wants to hit on her. But the gay man in me wants to compliment her on her awesome outfit.
He's currently rapping every word to 'more money more problems' at what could be a over 30s gay bar. I'm not sure yet. More info to come.
I cannot even. Taco bell reception. Beers. New friends from Georgia.
We are going to be Siegfried and Roy for Halloween and you are going to be the tiger.
Because he's your one night stand I shouldn't feel obligated to extend social media to him
One day. I will touch his hair. I'm curious if it'll be like a soft cloud.
Ski vacations are for hooking up with randoms. It's like I don't even know you
Today in French class my teacher was singing "what does the fox say" so i started answering in similar satanic ritual noises
Are you okay?
I went home with a 38 year old guy in a kilt, do I look okay!
Like its not even midnight and I've already had enough of her for all of 2015
I JUST WOKE UP WITH MY UBER DRIVER
I just dominated some guy while wearing your moms thong
I threw up in my 8 AM. Morale is low.
he said to "slap him" after he guessed the time correctly. i did.
Randomize
