I want to bang chis in dee ass burt he be hating on me times two. Me be tryin ti love onu
Bendover
Fuck. sleeping in my sisters room again I heard zombie noises outside my window
Theres someone in the car behind me eating corn on the cob & talking on the phone
What would you say if I got first degree burns on my nipples from drinking coffee topless?
She said i kept moaning her moms name instead of hers
Leaving someone plastered on a corner at 3am telling them to just scream for cock is NOT being a good wingman.
It mathmatically balances. Less pants + more shirt = fully clothed. see? Not a whore!
Was so drunk I had to masturbate face up cuz I thought I was gonna be suffocated by the pillows.
His legs actually look hot in that dress. He might even make a better girl than Josh
This is the Taco Bell dump we've all been waiting for.
Shout out to this stomach virus for helping me prepare for whatever slutty Halloween costume I decide to wear.
It's the 30 sec rule.... the worst that could happen is I could die
Omg last night I was giving shots out like I was the Willy Wonka of the alcohol world.
Just put me in your contacts as coyote
I got blackout last night and applied to be a banker
Randomize
