hi i'm bored and kind of... in a sort of dirty mood
pics
no i'm at a mixer dressed up as the teenage mutant ninja turtles
I mean roof. it goes up. its important day. you should recongziw it.
You're drunk. Make complete sentences.
It's not luke its my birthday or anything. Mike, understand.
I do no wrong. I am always right. Right? I forget why I am sending this. It seemed relevant.
If you get a breast reduction, you have to let me see them before hand at least once. It's a rule.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
capris are just wrong
its like "what can i possible wear to make myself look short and fat? Oh I know!!"
I've never had a woman show me her venereal disease results in a bar before.
My piss changed color midstream. Think that means I have a 50/50 chance of passing the test?
I don't think he understands what an important role his penis plays in my level of self esteem
found my necklace. it was safe with all 6 boxes of peeps that i bought that night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Only thing I got out of his drunken Spanish is something that sounded like "pencil sharpener." Damn rosetta stone.
The last time I saw you, you were rolling around on the ground at the bar.....
.....well it was bound to be an interesting night since I was chasing my pulls with pulls....
I'm high and reading a Wikipedia article on circumcision procedure. Help.
Why are your underwear on my dining room table?
Our motto for the night: BLACK OUT OR BACK OUT.
That's our motto every night.
Breakfast sounds amazing but can we do IHOP instead? I have to pick up a Plan B pill and there’s a CVS next to it
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